For every kid, their parents or guardians are the first friends they have in life. In their first years, parents are the only ones they can turn to for support and guidance, especially true for intersex children, who may face confusion and isolation as they learn about their bodies. Beyond the shock and confusion that often accompanies finding out the intersex variation of the child lies a remarkable opportunity – a chance for parents to become the first and most powerful advocates for their child’s health, well-being, and moreover, the human rights of the entire intersex community.
So what you – parents of intersex children could do?
Protecting Bodily Autonomy from Unnecessary Medical Interventions
One of the most critical roles you play is safeguarding your child’s right to bodily autonomy. And to no surprise, this role happens very early. Traditionally, some doctors may recommend surgeries to make intersex bodies conform to a binary sex norm. These procedures, often performed early in life, can have negative physical and psychological consequences.
As parents, don’t make your children suffer! By educating yourself on the risks and long-term effects of these surgeries, you can ensure your child has the freedom to choose how their bodies develop when they are old enough to understand the implications. Seeking out medical professionals who are knowledgeable about intersex variations and prioritize your child’s well-being is the key at this stage of your intersex children.
Open Communication for Understanding and Acceptance
You are your child’s first and most influential teacher. Your openness and honesty about their intersex variations play a vital role in shaping their self-esteem and building a foundation of acceptance. When you feel confused or uncertain, remember your child might be facing similar feelings, along with pressure from peers and society. Talk openly and lovingly with your child, creating a safe space for open dialogue is critically important.
Sharing your experiences with close friends, family members, and educators can also be a powerful tool for chipping away at stigma and misinformation. By creating a safe space for open dialogue, you can help others understand intersex variations and celebrate your child’s unique qualities, ultimately fostering an environment where your children can live and thrive without fear.
Joining the Intersex Movement for Lasting Change
Individually, parents of intersex children face a multitude of challenges, but together, a powerful collective voice can move the world. By joining the local and regional intersex movements, you can connect with a network of parents navigating similar experiences. This network provides a space for sharing resources, offering emotional support, and, most importantly, advocating for change on a larger scale. Our love should not stop with our family. We need to ensure an equal and safe world for our children to grow and fly!
Intersex Asia stands with you!
By advocating for these changes, you are not just protecting your child’s future but the future of all intersex individuals. A world where intersex variations are celebrated, not ostracized, starts with dismantling harmful stereotypes and creating a space for open communication. Your voice, combined with the voices of other parents, healthcare professionals, and allies, can be the force for lasting change.
Understand the importance of parents in championing intersex rights. Intersex Asia is launching a new initiative to connect with parents of intersex children to learn about their experiences accessing healthcare resources. We aim to provide them with proper knowledge, support, and potential connections to medical experts.
Becoming a parent of an intersex child is a unique and often unexpected journey. But remember, you are not alone in this. Your kids need you now! We at Intersex Asia always stand with you. Intersex Asia welcomes you to share your intersex healthcare issues with us in our “Intersex healthcare issues discussion” group. Together, we can build a world where intersex children can thrive, free from stigma and discrimination.
More information
Asian Intersex Statement 2023 – A document expressing the collective voice of Asian Intersex Adults from 9 Asian countries, including India, Indonesia, Nepal, Pakistan, Philippines, Taiwan, Thailand, Mongolia and Japan which reaffirms the existence of Intersex people, as well as voices demands and calls for actions that were articulated in the third Asian Intersex Forum, supported by the Intersex Human Rights Fund, which took place in Bangkok, Thailand, on 25-26 October
What We Wish Our Parents Knew (US) – A brochure created by young intersex advocates to prepare other families with intersex kids for the journey ahead of them
How Activism Led The Way Forward to Protect Intersex Children in Greece (Greece) – A story of a mother who stands up to change the law to protect her intersex child’s human right
Supporting Your Intersex Child (EU) – A toolkit to introduce the topic, give advice on how to best support your intersex child, and where to get further information
Supporting Your Intersex Child (Canada) – A toolkit to introduce the topic, give advice on how to best support your intersex child, and where to get further information
Supporting an Intersex Teenager(Australia) – A webpage with resources for families to understand how to best support your intersex teenager and where to get further information
